Lucky Number Seven.
Ratings. Ratings. Ratings. Round of applause gentlemen, I held this in the closet for a few months because I felt the timing had to be perfect to share it. So let's kick off year seven by dropping the news that we were once again voted the highest-rated league in the nation. As your commissioner, this doesn't come as a surprise but I thought you'd love to hear that you all played a role in this accomplishment. Billions and billions continue to line up to get into The League, yet once again I've passed up moving to a 12-man league. We remain as the elite 10 men with the privilege to be a part of something this special.
Some exciting changes took place at this year's annual owners' meeting. Hand over fist, money was thrown at me to bring The League to a new platform, and as I have announced, we struck a deal with Sleeper Fantasy. The original deal they presented in 2019 was trash but they came back this year with something very exciting, making us the exclusive partner for Chronicals' trading cards. Below you'll see the very first print, a 2023 Herbert "Year Seven" Pre-Draft trading card. I had to drop our agreement with Sports Illustrated, which cost me quite a bit of money, but if you download these images, and turn them into NFT's I'm sure they'll be worth money someday. Kinda like GME... Right?
Alright, now that I've reminded you all how privileged you are to be a part of this league, let's cover a few things. QB scoring has changed. You can read all about that by clicking HERE. The votes were tallied, and while I have to deal with the "ballot fraud" chants as I walk into my office, the vote to add the extra game for median scoring each week, did not pass. Life goes on, it will be back on the ballot next year. Ignore the schedule that you see after the draft. We have a custom schedule already made since it seems like all fantasy platforms have yet to figure out how to create a fair schedule. Here is the custom one I will import on Wednesday.
Below are the final keepers for each team. They've already been implemented into Sleeper where you can do mock drafts with the keepers in their slotted spots.
2023 Weekly Payouts
WEEK 1: Chicks Dig the Long Ball - Team with the QB with the longest pass
WEEK 2: Best Loser - Team that loses their weekly matchup with the highest point total
WEEK 3: Run Forrest Run! - Team with the RB with the most combined rushing and receiving yards
WEEK 4: Sweet 16 - Team with any starting TE that finished closest to 16 total points (over or under)
WEEK 5: The Bye Week - Team that wins with the biggest points margin of victory
WEEK 6: MVP - Team with the single highest scoring starter
WEEK 7: Blackjack - Team with a starter closest to 21 points without going over
WEEK 8: Over Achiever - Team with most points over their weekly projection
WEEK 9: Gotta Catch ‘Em All - Team with the starting WR with the most receptions
WEEK 10: Pursuit Drill - Team that has the defense with the most combined interceptions, fumbles and sacks
WEEK 11: Touchdown Jerry Rice! - The team with the most offensive touchdowns scored WEEK 12: North vs South Rivalry Week - Team that scores the highest points in their division AND wins their weekly matchup. Pays $20 to both the North and South team
WEEK 13: Right on the Money - Team closest to their projected point total (over OR under)
WEEK 14: Photo Finish - Team that beats its opponent by the smallest margin of victory
Should there be any ties, the people who tied can agree to split the cash or find a different way to declare a winner.
Less than 24 hours gentlemen. I look forward to doing my annual draft recap where I correctly guess who will outperform their ADP and which draft picks were terrible choices.